A night of music, and friends, and love.

Our friend Todd Chalfant was at the Mia Abides OMF fundraiser and captured some special moments from the evening. You can see a few pics here.

Thinking of Todd now, I'm reminded of something beautiful he did for Mia and me last summer. Todd had been telling us about Fire Island—a place that he likes get away to in the hottest months. His enthusiasm got Mia and me excited enough to want to go to Fire Island, but neither of us had ever been and didn't know where to go or what to do. Todd was happy to set us up in style, advising us about the ferry and arranging a sweet apartment for a long weekend. Soon after we got settled in, the two of us went out to the beach to play backgammon and catch a few rays. The sun was pretty intense that day, and we knew we shouldn't stay in it too long, but then Todd showed up on the beach and built us an impromptu cabana from driftwood, sheets, and towels. We napped awhile in the cool shade. When we opened our eyes, we found Todd had returned—with chips and a bowl of guacamole he'd made just for us. I'll never forget how good that guac tasted—late in the afternoon, alone with Mia, in our cozy shelter by the sea.

Thank you, Todd.

For those who like numbers.

The recent Mia Abides concert/auction event raised $1,705, which will be donated to the Ocular Melanoma Foundation. Additionally, numerous donations--totaling $1,961--have been gifted in Mia's name via the OMF Web site. $1,705 + $1,961 = $3,666. *THANK YOU* for your generosity.

What a week.

I'm still reveling in the joyful vibes of our celebrations this past Sunday and Monday in New York City. Many friends joined us for the concert/fundraiser at the Living Room and for our toast at the Maritime Hotel--friends from near and far, from all corners of Mia's multifaceted life. When I was visiting Nina in Marbella this summer, she told me several times how glad she is that Mia shared her friends with her. I am feeling that too, now more than ever. Mia introduced me to so many beautiful people. Even in her absence, I cannot help but feel blessed.

One of Mia's friends who's here now is Raj, from Dubai. Raj and I first met a while back, sharing a great meal together with Mia at Peasant in NYC. He came to town another time, when I was away, and he and Mia ate at Il Buco. He took us to Nobu when he visited us in San Diego in March. (I know their friendship went beyond their shared love of fantastic food, of course, but that particular bond was strong--as anyone close to Mia can appreciate.) A few nights ago, Raj reminded me that he had gone to the clinic in Tijuana with Mia during that same springtime visit. They went down to TJ early so they could be sure to enjoy the breakfast buffet at a very nice hotel nearby the clinic. I'd been there with Mia many times, so I knew how she relished all the fresh fruit, the chilaquiles, the hand-made tortillas grilled into quesadillas, the refritos, the hongos, the nopales, the tomatillo salsa. Ai!

Lately I've been reading Annie Proulx's Fine Just the Way It Is, a book of short stories about hard people and hard times in the old American West. Proulx colorfully describes one pioneer who didn't survive as having gone to "the land of no breakfast forever." Wherever Mia's spirit is now, I'd wager anything and everything that it is not the land of no breakfast forever. Far from it.

Toasting Mia in New York

Thank you Adam for the very special celebrations, the best tribute to Mia's wonderful life spirit- toast with friends, music, food and drinks on International Peace Day!!!

Toasting Mia in Dubai

Mia was a source of positive energy. We loved being around her because she spoke with such honesty and embraced life with such enthusiasm.

When we thought about taking a job in Afghanistan everyone around us thought we were crazy. But Mia's response was,"YES! Go! You'll love it!" And you know what? She was right. We did go and we did love it. I have often thought that without her enthusiastic endorsement we may have missed out on one of the greatest experiences of our lives.

When we decided to get married Mia was there to celebrate with us. She and Claudia pulled out all stops to help us enjoy the day. Mia enjoyed our random, crazy wedding along with the rest of us, but in a much more sober state, until the sun came up. All the time just loving being there for the wackiness. When we decided to do it all over again in Vegas Mia was one of the first to say she would be there. Sadly she couldn't make it in the end.

Mia was part of our lives for such a short time, but she will always be a shiny light in some of the most important parts of it.

Love, Rose & Stu.

ahi Mia Mia MIa

So good to read everyone's blogs, it's nice to feel connected to everyone Mia loved so much.

Here are some more morsels of Mia gold - she would have wanted us all to smile and laugh often and live, live life well, they way she did.

"have worked out that if i sit in the stair well i can get email and just about send if i am patient enough -

my ass hurts now though as so am gonna go to bed"

"I so wish we all lived in the same city - it would just be so cool .............. it's so hard that we are so
far from each other .. COÑO!! "

" I feel like I am on a perpetual holiday in New York. I fucking love this city. "

" I feel able and strong and positive and know that life is full of miracles :"

"we are so blessed: between LOVE and CONE and LIFE we are women who have it all :-)"

"i want to be fanned by a hunky guy and bathe in the ocean and a wallow in a ridiculously large swimming pool ..

and get massages"

" Hey so I dropped my phone down the toilet - yes indeed."

" i just met and had a chat to Mike Moore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! also saw the most amazing documentary. "pray the devil back to hell" - about women in liberia - it was so inspiring - so AMAZING!!!!!that was where i met mike. :) "

"Life is Weird"

"Okay - I know you guys are smiling and I am sending you with this e-mail the biggest, warmest hugs and whole atmospheres of love - I hope you choke on the amount of amor I am sending. "

I'm feeling the love Mia xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Toast to Mia

"So cool, guys"

On Saturday evening, a quarter of Mia's ashes were scattered under the three ash trees that her friends Tiff and others have planted in a small clearing in the little bluebell wood in Newton Valence in Hampshire that overlooks the surrounding patchwork of hedgerows and green fields.

As we friends of Mia's gathered around a bonfire, there were a few tears, a little bit of laughter, together with poems, readings and fond memories as we exchanged anecdotes and raised our glasses of champagne to the lovely friend we all miss so much.

We were all pretty sure that she was somewhere nearby saying: “so cool, guys.”

Although I can't be in New York today, I'll be thinking of Mia and everyone who has gathered together over there this evening.

Remembering Mia

I remember Mia when I first met her in the airport in San Luis Obispo. She got off the plane with Adam and approached me with a delicious hug and a great big smile. That Thanksgiving week-end we got acquainted over Chai tea, we walked on the beach, and we all shared our holiday dinner. Adam asked me to make sure we had all the traditional foods since this would only be Mia's second Thanksgiving celebration in this country. Mia bridged the generation gap by spending time with our granddaughter, Cambria, helping her study Spanish and allowing Cambria to style her hair. We celebrated Adam's birthday and I hoped this would be the first of many celebrations we would have with Adam and Mia.
The following October, I visited Adam and Mia in New York and they introduced me to "their" Lower East Side. It was clear that Mia loved New York and was so happy to share it with me. She and I shared a lovely day at the Guggenheim Museum. I have a magnet on my refrigerator of a painting that we both enjoyed. Whenever I see that magnet, I remember that day with Mia.
I had a couple of visits with Mia in San Diego when she was there for treatment. I went to the clinic with her and was impressed by her bravery and positive attitude. We had some long talks and she told me of the amazing adventures she had had in so many places around the globe. I remember when she said that she would have no regrets because she had always done everything she had wanted to do. I've known people who had lived so many more than her 33 years and could not say that as they approached the end of their lives.
I'll never forget Mia, the woman who came into my son Adam's life and into mine for such a short time. She made a difference in our family just as she had everywhere she travelled. I pray that she is a peace.

Mia's day

I had planned to attend the toast at the Maritime tonight in Mia's honor, but, sadly, have to teach. I'll be thinking of you Mia. 6:30 pm tonight I'll raise a glass (of tea) to you. Wine after class...

I miss you terribly and hope that you are at peace.

Mia brought so much joy and relief to my own struggle with cancer. Up to stage 4 now, it's once again in remission and I'm back to life as usual. I won't forget Mia's request as she slid her arm under mine, held tight and said, "let's grow old together ok"?

Bless my darling Mia, may heaven be filled with peace and serenity-and delicious cappucinos.

Sending love to you and to all.

Here's to world peace - cheers

Kelly

Wondering

I wonder where she went
With that big smile and all her bubbles
I wonder what she does
With all that energy and determination
I wonder how we heal
While building lives around a hole
I wonder if she watches
When we hurt and laugh and wonder
I wonder why she went
Whether someone had a bigger plan
I wonder when we’ll meet
Though somehow it happens every day

A few more photos worth sharing. I particularly like the one caught of her one night in the early a.m. when I was on the sofa at Mia and Adam's apartment ... I awoke to find Mia searching for something, covered only by a cork board!

Two of the others are of Max's baptism. What a happy child! hahaha.

In your honour

It’s taken me all these months to enter this site about Mia. After her passing I spent the summer in Brazil, in many ways escaping the intensity of her last weeks here in San Diego. All along I was somehow reluctant to log on for fear of the emotion it would provoke. Well today it did just that. Big time. Yet, I’m happy to have gone through it, because all the beautiful things written about her brought back only the best of memories. As if she were here again, I could see her sitting cross-legged in a café, looking fabulous while being relaxed and entertaining as only Mia could. Part of her charm was how naturally she fit in to every situation, and how her unassuming attitude made everyone around her feel so comfortable. Mia lit up the room, but had no airs about it at all.

I met Mia close to 14 years ago in Marbella, and we often hung out at the same social events with shared friends. Yet it wasn’t until I had the *privilege* to be her roommate in New York City that we really got to know each other as adults, and instantly became inseparable partners in crime. I found us an apartment in the LES before she ever arrived -- the perfect pad and neighborhood for two people each starting a new life in the city. Her passion for New York was insatiable and contagious. We were never bored and rarely at home, preferring to spend hours on end -- whole afternoons -- at our local bar/café on the corner of Clinton and Stanton, (which is where she met Adam).

I think Mia and I hit it off so well because of our common interests: We had passion for human rights work, media and journalism, (being fabulous and funny), and particularly a love of children. Mia had a knack for kids – they loved her, and she never stopped going on about her nieces and nephews. When I introduced her to my own nephew Max, his greetings to me immediately changed from “Yaay, Andy’s here!” to “Hi Andy, where’s Mia?”… I had been demoted! J We later became Max's godparents.

It was hard to trade NYC for San Diego, in large part because Mia made New York so much damn fun. Especially when the Marbella divas would come to town - boy how my stock in the neighborhood soared when seen walking down the street with that gorgeous clan!

Though I would have traded anything and everything for Mia’s health, it was, for me, a fortunate twist that she chose to undergo treatment in San Diego and Tijuana. So much of her last two years were spent here, and I’m blessed to have been near to her during her final months.

When I think of Mia, I often think of her unwavering determination, fueled largely by a Danish stubbornness that made her a fiercely independent thinker. When reflecting on the last five years of her life, one is more apt to describe her as the "bionic woman" rather than a cancer patient. Few could match her accomplishments. She uprooted her life and landed an internship with UNICEF in Geneva. She spent a summer in Mexico teaching photography to blind children. She was accepted into two of the most competitive Master’s program in the U.S.: Columbia and the New School. At the New School she completed her Master’s degree in the normal two years, despite prolonged absences while undergoing constant cancer treatment. (She didn't need to read the books, she would tell me ... 'cause through life experiences in Afghanistan and the Middle East, she knew it all already!) She married a rock star. And then worked at the Covenant House, a charity shelter for homeless children … and so much more!

In her own words: “I’m fucking magic!” Yup, my friend. You truly are.

... Mia, babe, I have no doubt that you are enjoying your new existence, that you are already in charge of making waves, moving mountains and re-arranging the planets and the stars.

You continue to inspire in life. & to evoke love. Te quiero, tía. Para siempre. Andy.

Loca

World Peace Day soon, the girls downunder have taken some time off to spend the day together thinking about Mia and remembering all the things we love about her. Both Noemi and Finn have been talking about you of late and in that way that only children can, so matter of fact that you are gone, living with the angels and therefore always here. So close an yet so far. Miss you everyday angel. Looking forward to spending a day in your honor remembering all the great times.